What’s the most embarrassing song on your mp3 player?

Chris Brown

Digital music has blessed us with improved control over listening choice and greater access to a wide variety of audio files, but perhaps the most concerning convenience (besides the whole piracy thing) is the ability to conceal our musical weaknesses. Where once we could rifle through a potential lover’s dubious CD collection, we can now hide the sins of our ears in tiny little devices nobody ever has to see. You could be sleeping with someone who listens to Nickelback and not even know it.

Do we have a duty of care before engaging in shenanigans with new companions? Should we be disclosing that third Miley Cyrus single we purchased or is everything fair in love and war? When I first met my husband, it was the early 2000′s and mp3 devices were only beginning to infiltrate the market. I was able to reconcile his predilection for Savage Garden, Tupac and Bon Jovi from the start. I’m not sure I could do that now the shine’s worn off.

In all seriousness, it struck me like lightening, like a bolt out of the blue that I also have weaknesses such as Kylie Minogue that should be shared, celebrated even. I would love to say it’s all Frank Ocean and Vampire Weekend but that would be a highlight reel lie. A fuzzy Amaro filter over my iTunes library.

Calvin Van Guetta

Show me a Scottish/Italian/French House DJ produced track with guest vocals from the latest female pop sensation and I’ll show you my iTunes password.

Dodgy song lyrics

Not being an academic feminist, I’m always up for an education from my learned sisters as long as it doesn’t involve me saying no to a 500gm medium-rare porterhouse or shady song lyrics when the beat’s the highlight of my running playlist. I’ll give you back Chris Brown but please don’t take away Blurred Lines.

Other embarrassments include J-Lo (circa 2012), Hall and Oates and Jason DeRulo.

Your turn now, what’s the most embarrassing tracks on your mp3 player?